I know... I AM HORRIBLE AT THIS!

So much has happened since I last got to blog, I have thought about blogging and WANTING to write so much in the last 9 weeks, and honestly it has all been a little crazy.

Here is a quick recap and my plan for the blog moving forward:

Oct 29, 2012- I flew to Ethiopia without a Court decree in the hopes that I would land and be able to take custody of the kids on Nov 1.

Oct 30, 2012- I landed and received word we HAD OUR COURT DECREE!! Two more Huff's had officially joined our family. The plan was for me to do three visits to the orphanage and then take custody on Nov 1. The purpose of this was that the social worker here in the states thought a gradual transition for the kids would be better than just taking them right away... so on Oct 30 I went to the orphanage to be reunited with my babies after 11 months of being separated. PLANS TO RECAP THIS LATER ON

Oct 31, 2012- After a long sleepless night, I made the decision to take the kids from the orphanage and NOT do the gradual transition. WE LEFT TOGETHER BEFORE LUNCH!

After much drama with USCIS, we finally cleared Embassy the day after Thanksgiving, along with Ricky who had joined me in Ethiopia a week before, we left for the US on Black Friday =)

We have now been home 4 1/2 weeks. We have had a multitude of company the last week, celebrated Christmas for the first time as a whole family and had much time to bond.

Here is what I have learned: Things never go as you expect. I want to elaborate more on this, and I will. I have been keeping a list in my head of the things I want to blog about. Things that I think every adoptive parent should know. Things I wish the world around us knew about adoption. Things I need to processes through.

So in short here is the plan for 2013 and this blog...
I want to recap our time in Ethiopia (complete with pictures and some of my thoughts and the people we met).
I want to touch on a few topics of things I am processes through as an adoptive parent... like how the entire world does not see this adoption the same way I do.

I want to touch on some things I wish the world around me knew about adoption in general... but this one might take some time.. because I need to pray about how to deliver some of what I am wanting to say.

I left my computer cord at the office, to which I haven't been to in a while... like 3 months... and so I am using Ricky's until I can figure it out on the ipad... blog posts might be few and far between, but I want to get it all down. I want to remember these moments and have something to look back at in a year, two years and three years.

As I am writing, Ricky tells me he gets an email notification every-time I post a blog... something wigs me out about having my own husband read this... GET OVER IT B!! 
 

Another small delay.. but we knew it was coming

Well, our court date came and went yesterday without a Court decree.. but we knew that it might be possible. You see the Court in Ethiopia is moving through court dates so quickly that sometimes Federal MOWA is having a harder time keeping up with the demand for file review and recommendations. We knew that they might lag a few days behind... thus the lack of stress regarding this specific issue.

Oh how I am wishing there were more hours in the day. I am still not packed, I am still actually working through my packing list. In my mind, extended stay is so much more intense than a week stay. So I guess that is making a little crazy. I am thankful to have such an amazing group of adoptive Momma's to glean wisdom from about my extended stay. I have learned the following:

I can get medications for things like Scabied, Lice and Giardia in Ethiopia with little problems. I have learned that I need to pack more than one pillow case... hmmm... can anyone say lice? EEEWWWW!

I am working through this list and I have to say, staying in country and working through things like lice and scabies and ringworm sound better than passing them to the other 8 people in our home. THAT SOUNDS LIKE A NIGHTMARE!!!

Remember this..?

Well, I am getting back on a jet plane and headed to Ethiopia to go take custody of our little ones! I am very excited and nervous. I am leaving October 29! While I am gone, for a length of time I do not know yet, I will be leaving my amazing husband and our littles here. I know he has lots of support, but man I am nervous about all the added stress for him while I am gone.

I have been cooking lots of meals and am planning a cooking day with my mom to freeze a bunch of pre-cooked or crock pot meals for them in the hopes that having dinners done will help.

We have been so blessed by the people who have helped financially for my extended stay.... It was overwhelming to say the least. We have calculated the total to be about $65 a day for me to be there with the kids... If you wanted to help still, you can click on the "ChipIn" link on the right =)

Please be praying for our family, while we are thousands of miles apart yet again, to be strong.. to lean on God and the people God has placed near us. Please be praying for G and G, I know the transition will be exciting and scary for them. 

A date... a date..

Today we received word that our Court Decree will be ready October 22, 2012, and then G & G will legally be HUFF's!

We are beyond happy and still a little in shock that this is finally happening after waiting so long. Please be praying for us while we make travel arrangements. Also if you could be listing up G & G as their little worlds are about to change, that God would cover them in peace and that they would be blessed by our time together in Ethiopia.

Happy Birthday Baby Girl

For 11 months we have waited for one single piece of paper, one paper that said something we already knew... that our G & G needed a Momma and Daddy to love, care for, and protect them. 

Thursday, October 4, was my baby girl's 2nd birthday. I was at my parents getting ready for my soon to be sister-in-law's bridal shower when at about 10:30am Catherine from BCSI called me. I know her number by heart, I know it because every week she called to tell me this WAS NOT the week we had been waiting for and that maybe next week was the week. 

It was late in the day Ethiopia time, and I figured she was delaying the inevitable by calling so late in the morning. My disappointed tears we already brimming my eyes when I answered the phone. Something was different in her voice.. she was almost chipper... "Hello Brandi, this is Catherine..." something was going on.. my hands started to shake.. "I wanted to be able to tell you that we received word that your letter has been signed and Ash has approved your case." Commence sobbing... As I sat around the table with my sister, brother-in-law, and parents... I received one of the most amazing phone calls EVER! We got the letter we have waited and prayed for... we got it!

This moment was tinged with sadness, my sweet sister-friends who have been struggling through this journey with us, waiting and hoping for a letter of their own, did not receive a letter Thursday and our hearts are heavy for them. I never imagined moving through without them. I never imagined being the one to plan my flight, without my girls. My heart is heavy and I am praying for a miracle and standing with them to fight! 

But she is SOOOO busy :/

We have been waiting for the signatures we need from the head of SMOWA for over three weeks now. Each time our social worker has an appointment to receive the documents with the needed signatures the person who needs to sign them is not available.

Two weeks: She was sick... and just could not come to work...
Last week: So busy from being sick she did not have time to review
This week... She was in a meeting and could not be bothered...

So we wait and pray... every Tuesday and Thursday it is like a roller coaster of thoughts and emotions.

Moment of honesty here:
If one more person tells me "All in God's perfect timing" I am going to freak out! I know God's over arching plan is for Him to be glorified. Glorified in the waiting, glorified in the heart break, glorified in the reunion of our family. HOWEVER, I know that God does sit there and smile down on this woman as she forces our children to stay in an orphanage. I know that the reason they are still there is not because God hasn't planned for them to come home yet or we are not ready, but because of human's and their selfish desires to be powerful. Sin is the reason our children are not home yet, selfishness and the need for power are the reason our children are not home yet... Not God.

Is Satisfied...

On Friday of last week we received word that the "expert" who was reviewing our case "... is satisfied" and it is now with the head of SMOWA for signatures. We were told that we would have a decision today, however, this morning learned that the head of SMOWA was ill and not able to come to work yesterday, so she did not review and sign our documents as expected. She told our agency she would have a decision on Friday (Thursday being a Holy Day).

This roller coaster keeps getting more crazy.... 

Never mind...

There is major drama right now going on with our file in Ethiopia. We were not resubmitted as planned and all we can hope for is that next week it will happen. We also got an update on Grace and today I am feeling crushed by the weight of the photos. One of them is of her, with arms reached up and tears in her eyes.. the caption is "K wants to be held.."... just kill  me now. That is more than this Momma's heart can handle today.

I am frustrated, and so I am sure that will come across in my post today.

Why can't everyone just get their freaking act together and get what needs to be signed a signature!? Really? How hard can this be!!? People need to be where they say they are going to be and do what they say they are going to do.... My babies are waiting for me and I am longing for them.

Tears.

Getting Re-Submitted Tomorrow

Tonight, while we sleep, our paperwork will be resubmitted to the people in Ethiopia that we so need to write the letter approving our children for adoption. We are praying that this happens swiftly and they don't ask for additional corrections. Would you pray with us for a swift, positive response?

We will not make it...

In short, we will not make it before the Court closes, thus we will likely not be able to travel to Ethiopia for our littles until mid-October or after. This has been a hard week and I am praying for my sweet friends who are stuck like us. I know their hearts are tired like mine.

I don't know what the next two months holds, but I do know it will be filled with prayer of safety and health over G & G. 

Words of Wisdom

I am loving these words of wisdom from other adoptive Momma's!

An Open Letter- This is a letter from an adoptive Mom to friends and family about they can support them during their time after the Airport!

Life After the Airport-  This is a blog post from someone I truly respect about the days AND weeks after the airport.

I know that there are times of trial ahead. Even greater trial that what we face today in the fight to bring our babies home, but I am all in! I will fight for them while they are on another continent and I will fight for them when they are here. I will fight for all our kids, to show them the love and security they need to grow into amazing men and women of God. Seeking first the Kingdom.

I hope you read these and pray for us while we parent. 

Here we go again...

So after a week of pure torture, we learned we will be resubmitted for the approval letter we need on Tuesday. We are so close to not making the Court closure this year that I am starting to freak out! Would you please be praying with us that this week sees the approval our case needs and that we would be able to obtain the ever so coveted Court Decree?

The courts in Ethiopia close for the rainy season sometime in August until sometime in October. Although there is no official announcement yet, and we do know of people who are traveling for Court dates on August 8th, we also have been watching the weather like "old people" watch the weather. It has been raining non-stop for over two weeks now.. which means, the rainy season has begun and the closure is imminent. If we do not have our Court decree by the closure, we have to wait until is opens sometime in October.. I can't, right now, think about that. I am hoping and praying and believing that God is working a miracle here and we will be able to get our decree before the closure.

We got another video of Big Man G today, his sweet laugh and tender smile melt me. I miss him so much that I just can't handle it... watching him today brought me to my knees. I cried every time (all 100) that I watched it. I wish we had gotten a video of Princess G, but I know that is harder because she is little <3

Would you pray for us: We are emotionally exhausted from the back and forth and up and down trying to bring our G's home.. I feel like I am short with everyone and I don't like that. My patience is short... I need to have grace.

Walking in Faith

This week has held more setback and defeating moments that I thought could be possible at this stage in the adoption. Out of respect for our agency and the government systems in ET, I will not elaborate on what has happened... only that those mighty steps forward that we had taken over the past two weeks were countered by 5 steps backwards. Yesterday and today have been full of tough decisions and lots of emotional conversations.

All of this to say: WE ARE NOT GIVING UP HOPE, WE ARE NOT GIVING UP ON OUR BABIES. WE ARE WALKING FORWARD IN FAITH.... 


God is the one who designs families, and no matter how long it might take... we are going to continue down the path God lead our family in July of 2009.


Please be praying for the 8 other families, besides our own, who are stuck in the same mess of paperwork and frustration. Please be praying for all of the kids stuck in this mess, who have been waiting for their families with much anticipation... waiting for a very long time.


*** We have been sending Big Man G lots of pictures over the past several months and today we got to see photo's of him sitting and looking through the pictures of his brothers and laughing and smiling... oh how my Momma heart needed that today.***


WE ARE COMING FOR YOU PRINCESS G AND BIG MAN G! WE LOVE YOU AND WILL FIGHT FOR YOU!

While we sleep... or not sleep... Day 236

Last night was not a good night to sleep, but actually was a good night to pray. I have some major kidney stones right now... major... and was in too much pain to sleep... so most of the night I prayed.

Ethiopia starts their day right as we are headed to bed each night... each night I think... "While I am sleeping will our world change? Will our cases make progress? Will someone in Ethiopia look at our files and realize we have been waiting 7 months 23 days to go back and pick up our kids?"

Last night there was suppose to be a meeting to discuss our case, this morning we are having a hard time confirming that meeting happened. Not that I am counting, but did you know it has been 236 days since we have seen our kids?


Would you all pray with us that if the meeting did not happen last night while we prayed and waited, that it would happen tonight? Would you pray that our case would be given the paperwork it needs and we can be submitted for a Court Decree?

****On a side note, we just went to my good friend Wendi's little sweetness's birthday party on Monday evening where I met a lovely couple I had never met before. We were talking about the adoption and she asked me the name of my blog,,, and do you know what? I could not remember it?! LOL! I never have been  super into tracking my blog posts and stats... but her comments got me interested a little... so I peaked... I am so blessed by the number of people who view my blog daily and are following us on this journey.

If I don't know you personally, would you leave me a comment? I would love to follow your blog as well!  

Overwhelmed!!

I don't even know what to say today.... I am overwhelmed by the love and support coming from all over the country for our family. Knowing that each of you are praying for us, has been and will continue to be, the most uplifting time in my life. Truly, being able to see God's people surround each-other and pray over one another from thousands of miles away is one of the things that brings me to my knees regularly.

Over the past week we have been so blessed by many thoughtful emails and blog postings about our family and the journey we are on to bring G & G home forever! Here are just a few of the amazing people who have changed me...
Our Family... over the past two and half years, they have been the foundation of encouragement and support while we navigated the process of adoption. It is confusing and I know they try their best to understand, they are excited to support us when we bring the kids home and I know they will be welcomed and loved by our amazing family.
Our Small Group- You all have prayed for us, listened to be cry, and held our hands while we waited for news... I am so thankful for each of you and I am so thankful for the support you have offered while I am in Ethiopia with G & G.
MY Desiree wrote the sweetest blog posting about our family here. It was an honor to hold her T while we were in Ethiopia, she has been a rock of strength and encouragement, calling and sending messages as her family prayers for ours.
My dear friend Rachel and her amazing hubs welcomed us into their home and prayed over our family, for G & G and for the process in Ethiopia. Touched my heart in ways they will never know.
Beauty for Ashes (My Chicago Ladies) YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU ALL!!! My heart is overwhelmed daily by your support, advise, and prayers...
The people I have never met- Over the past two weeks I have received emails and facebook messages from families across the globe that are adopting or have already adopted, their words of encouragement and even some with financial support for my stay in Ethiopia, have just been amazing.

In April, I got a tattoo on my arm... it says "The Journey is the Reward"... You my friends, near and far, are the reward along this journey of bring our G's home. 

Big Decision on the Front in the Huff House

So.... this is where we are at right now. Ricky and I have been praying about and have talked with our families and made the decision that once we have a Court Decree in Ethiopia... I will travel to Ethiopia and take immediate custody of G and G and stay at a long-term guest house until we obtain US Visa's for the kids and can travel home. At that time, Ricky will fly to Ethiopia to  help me return with the kids. This is a complex decision, and it involves two difficult scenarios.

I am horribly scared to leave our little buggers here for a period of unknown time, likely between 4-6 weeks or a touch longer... and I am horrible scared to not go and leave our little buggers in the orphanage for any longer than necessary. So picking between the two, has been really hard. Lots of tears, but we know that Ricky and our amazingly supportive family is here for the boys... and no one is there in Ethiopia for G and G... except me... soon!

We have been so blessed by the a surprise job for me over the past two years... that paid for the adoption and allowed us to move into a bigger home that will fit our expanding family. Now that I am not working and this additional adoption expense has crept up, we are praying for another miracle. Also, recently become very aware that while we thought we would all fit in our car, the car seat situation makes that impossible when G and G come home..... and as of the end of 2011 the Adoption Tax Credit is not something that will supplement all the funds we have spent over the past two years in the adoption process. Because of the delay in our case, we were faced with additional costs that I don't think anyone anticipated... again pulling on the reserve for the car fund.

We are applying for adoption Grants and saving like crazy right now. The best we can calculate, it will cost me and the kids about $65.00 a day to stay in Ethiopia and we will need to purchase an open ended ticket allowing us to travel back, but with the ability to change the date (I am sure you know the costs associated with anything airline related! HA!).... So here we are, praying and trusting that God is going to provide for what we know HE is calling our family to do... for Momma to go to Ethiopia and care for the littles there until we can come home all together!

Would you join us in prayer over the following items:

1. Timing of travel... kids starting school, my brother getting married, etc.
2.  Cost of my extended stay in Ethiopia with the kids and airline tickets that have flexibility
3. Ricky and the boys while I am gone.... It is no secret to any of us that this will be a challenge
4. G and G's health...
5. My health while in Ethiopia
6. My heart while away from Ricky and the boys for such a long period of time.

Blessings!

Brandi and Ricky Huff

Progress....?! Could it be real?

So this last week we have renewed HOPE that our littles are coming home soon! Here is where we are now...
We have 1 of the 3 letters needed to approve the kids for adoption, that does not seem like very much BUT our cases have been submitted to the 2 level for approval and they have promised after changes were made to some paperwork that they would approve the cases. Those changes have been made! Our case will be submitted back to the 2 level for approval this week and based on what we have been told... they have promised to processes these cases (4 families total stuck in the same paperwork mess as our case) with urgency... fully understanding it has not been 7 MONTHS since we traveled for court! 


The third level has, from the beginning, agreed to sign the letter needed ASAP and then we would have the much coveted Court Decree legally making G & G our kids! At that point, things will really start moving along and we will be making plans to travel to Ethiopia again.

Please be praying for our family as we process through timing in travel to Ethiopia. Big Man G has not been looking very good and we are concerned over his health, so prayers over him is also appreciated.

As for the Huff's right now... we are trying to enjoy summer and all that comes with that! Here are a few moments of the first 6 weeks of summer...

 It is really stressful around here... can you tell? lol

 Me and my dearest friend Em hanging out at the beach in Newport!

  

Selfish....

Soooo... I am guessing that my selfishness has been brought to light this last week. We got an update that stated: "Your paperwork is ready to be resubmitted, however we are waiting to submit everyone's together"............ long pause, deep breath, and cry selfish "why oh why do we have to go all together" tears. Please don't get me wrong, I LOVE each of the families that we have been on this extended journey with, each of them have a special place in my heart... I know that we will forever be friends and have a bond that no one, unless you have been in our shoes, could duplicate. I LOVE each of their children, having wept long hours over each of the names and we prayed for them. I am selfish, and I am working on it and praying for forgiveness as God continues to bring to light what He wants changed in me.

We are now only getting updates on Fridays, which makes for a long week, but I am praying this week will bring tears of joy...

We are at the end of re-doing our dossier, since we have been told that it expired yesterday. So my prayer warrior friends, would you pray with us that we can get our paperwork completed and sent to Ethiopia as quick as possible and that if for some reason Federal MOWA looks at our file prior to us getting the new paperwork to them, that they would pass us even without the updated documents.... since nothing has changed, I am still the same person that I said I was on my birth certificate 2 years ago, which has not changed in 30 years. =/

26 Weeks.....

This week marks the 26th week since we left Ethiopia, since we have been able to hold and love on our kiddos. 26 weeks of waiting for a the paperwork to be processed so we can bring them home.

We have been enlightened over the past several weeks of the "new" processes in which our case falls into, and we are tracking carefully to see what is next and what we need to be praying for to happen in Ethiopia.

It is so complicated, and most of the time I feel like unless I am talking to someone who is engulfed in the world of Ethiopian Adoption, I sound like this "wahwahwhahhawhaha". We have basically given this new process a 14 step breakout processes and as of yesterday we are on step number 7.

God has been teaching me so much through all of this, I thought I had learned patience, and I think I have. But what I guess I had not learned was that these kids, or Jake or Carter or Noah are not my own. They are God's children given to me for a short period of time, to be used by God to help mold and shape them into the people God has carved for them in the future, to assist them in impacting their worlds for Christ. And in our home or not in our home, they are God's children. I am learning trust now. Trust in the God that brought our two Ethiopian babies to us and trust in a God who is holding them close while we can not.

"The Journey is the Reward"..... something I am being constantly reminded of....

Throughout my life, God has taken me on many journeys. Some private, some public. Some that have brought me closer to Him and some that have pushed me and I chose to walk away from Him. The Journey's God has given me, to grow me, to shape me have actually been more rewarding than the actual end of the specific journey.

When I found myself to be a single Mom, with a 6 week old, I was sure that I had reached the end of what I could handle in my young life. After having lost three amazing, precious babies back to my Lord... I was finally able to hold and love my son and I was all the sudden going through a divorce. I am thankful that this journey brought me back to the Lord. It taught me to lean on the strength of my Savior, on the family and friends that God placed in my life. This journey has given me the ability to become part of who I am today. I love deeply and with my whole heart. I take my relationships with my family and friends with a seriousness that sometimes freaks people out. I am loyal to the end. That journey of my life brought many rewards.

I am on another journey, and I am excited for the what God is doing in my life... and what those rewards will be when this part of the journey is complete. Who knows what the next journey will be? Who knows what I will learn or how I will be stretched? God does. And I bet He is as excited for it as I am. =)

Still Waiting...

Well, the reason for the silence is compounded right now. One.. we moved to our new house and don't have internet, so blogging has gone to the wayside. Surely, there is not enough time in the day to do this at work!

Second, I feel like if I write it, it makes it more true. We are still waiting. Waiting to pass Court. Waiting for the letters from MOWA to come through. Today we got told that all Southern Region cases were moving forward, except the region where "K" and "G" are from.... I am doing my very best here to give this all over to a God bigger than my worry or sadness.

We would appreciate your prayers over "K" and "G" while we wait to bring them home.